Married to my stuff

Dear all,

I found out something today that disturbed me a little. There was a girl, once, that went to the same school as me. We certainly weren’t friends, but we were in the same year, so of course I knew her a little. Then, one year, she left. She never came back. I don’t know if her friends knew she planned on leaving, but I didn’t. I wasn’t particularly perturbed – I just assumed she was going to another school, perhaps another part of the country.

Today, we became Facebook friends. And I discovered that when she left our school, she dropped out of school altogether to get married. SHE WAS SIXTEEN! HOW COULD HER PARENTS LET HER GET MARRIED?? It’s just too mental to comprehend. She has her wedding photos on Facebook. She has some massive meringue dress, all netting and virginal purity. It looked expensive. But how can you get married at sixteen? No education to speak of, no job, no home, no independence… I can’t even begin to imagine it.

In other news, I have been thinking about moving away to university, and what I’ll bring with me, what I’ll leave at home, and what I’ll throw away. I really aspire to a kind of minimalist lifestyle, with minimal “stuff”. It seems to me that “stuff” just weighs you down. In my ideal world, I’d love to have the kind of household full of only things I love that I could just pack up and move with at a moment’s notice. I shall do some serious decluttering at the beginning of summer – or perhaps during study leave instead of studying! However, I will need to buy some new things. Like mugs to bring with me, and a new duvet cover. I want to buy ones that I’ll like for a long while to come, so I’m starting to think and browse now.

To be honest, I just can’t imagine how much stuff I’ll have to cart to uni and back at the beginning and end of every term. It seems insane. Also, there’s some things I want to get rid of but can’t quite seem to steel myself to actually trash them, though god knows they need it. Like clothes that don’t fit me and will never fit me again. (But you might be able to do something with them! Let them out or reconstruct them! No, I know I’ll never get round to it.)

Lots of love,
Wilhelm Scream.



  1. Phillip said,

    Saturday, 18th April 2009 at 10:54 pm

    I was in a situation once where a friend got married at 18, while still in school, and that freaked me out enough. 16? I mean, like every other person, I thought I knew everything when I was 16, but even then I think the idea of a supposedly lifelong commitment would be pretty daunting.

    Minimalism is awesome theory, by the way, until you realize how freaking awesome toasters are.

    • Sunday, 19th April 2009 at 12:30 am

      Dear Phillip,

      Jeez, I’d have a toaster in my minimalist house! Toast is quite a good minimalist meal. Cheese on toast… poached egg on toast… mushrooms on toast… the concept of “stuff on toast” is sheer simplicity. And to be honest I think I’ll always crave the ideals of minimalism without ever quite making it to walking the walk!

      I guess I still think I know everything, but at the same time I know I don’t. Certainly not enough to get married. I have another friend who is “engaged”. She has a ring and everything, but I don’t think she’s really and truly engaged. I have decided not to accept any marriage proposals until I leave university. Then I might actually have a clue about where my life is going and how I might like marriage to fit into it. Is your friend still married after X years?

      Sorry for the epic comment-reply.

      Lots of love,
      Wilhelm Scream.

      P.S. I like the name Phillip. I study philosophy and we always call it “Phil”, as in Uncle Phil from the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air.

      • Phillip said,

        Sunday, 19th April 2009 at 1:46 am

        It’s good you have your toast-related priorities straight.

        I get what you’re saying with thinking you know everything, but not. I still always think I know a better way of doing things, but I grasp that if something’s in place, there’s probably _some_ fair logic behind it.

        I lost contact with the friend who got married 😦 I’m not even sure what her name was… hrm. I doubt it, tho’. No offense to her, she was a very cool chick, but she got eloped without her parents’ knowledge, which just sends a bunch of bad signals to me (rebellion, recklessness).

        Pffft, I’m normally the one who ends up ranting too much in comments, I enjoy the chitchat ^^

        P.S. I like the name too, makes me feel fancy. The Uncle Phil reference slightly fortifies that, thanks!

  2. Potato Chef said,

    Sunday, 19th April 2009 at 3:07 pm

    I also like toast. As long as it is not over cooked.

    It used to normal for people to get married when they were 16. Heck, life expectancy used to be 40, so half your life was almost over.

    If marriage was like toast then butter wouldn’t be necessary.

    A side note: I personally do not like microwaved “baked” potatoes either.

    • Sunday, 19th April 2009 at 4:23 pm

      Dear Potato Chef,

      Back when girls got married at sixteen, they didn’t really have much choice. No one did. You got a job after leaving school/university and would probably stay with the same company for the rest of your life. Furthermore, women wouldn’t work so the only way of getting ahead was to marry someone rich who would provide for you. It’s different now – everyone has more options and, given the number of people who go to university, for many people your life doesn’t even start until you’re 21.

      Lots of love,
      Wilhelm Scream.

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